Today, I was adding the newest entry to my “Defeat” page when I noticed something grand. This newest failure marks my 20th rejection since I started submitting short stories to various Internet publications. Twenty!
High-fives everybody. Down low. Whoops…too slow. Sucker.
Oh, don’t feel bad. I mean, you couldn’t have possibly known I was going to yank my hand away like that at the last second. Really, it’s indicative of my cruelty rather than your lack of speed or coordination. You’re great. No, really. Super-awesome. I’m the bad guy. There, don’t you feel better?
Anyway, let’s take a quick look at the record: 20 defeats vs. 8 victories. Using magic, I’ve determined that’s a whopping 40% success rate. That’s not too shabby for someone who predicted he’d be dead by the age of twenty-one. Apparently, much like writing, prognostication isn’t one of my strong points.
To celebrate this depressing milestone, I’ve decided to work a little prestidigitation on my blog title, now renamed I’m Trying to Write. Although I liked the name Try to Write since it was kind of a public instruction to myself, I think the new title more accurately describes what I’m trying to accomplish here. Content’s going to remain the same though. Sorry.