Slightly Better Than a Paper Sack

Ladies and gentlemen; boys and girls; people of indeterminate age and gender … After weeks…nay, YEARS…of collectively holding your breath, those of you who aren’t dead should happily cast your eyes upon the glorimagnimaniousness splendor that is the cover of my very first novel, Strange Beasts in a Small Town, which I’m planning to vanity…I mean, independently…publish in late October/early November on various online bookstores.

Huge thanks to my father, Louis Armour, for designing such a fantastic cover. The final results are better than I imagined they would be, which says a lot about both his skill and my faith in that skill.

For those who don’t know…likely all of you…Strange Beasts in a Small Town tells the story of a small Alabama town that suddenly finds itself home to not one but two giant monsters. These include King Vislor (featured on the cover) — a neurotic hound-like beast with an obsession for humans — and Rubbish — a sentient mound of trash whose presence lends the town a lovely year-round odor. When the town’s residents begin to worry that a special government agency plans to weaponize the latter of these creatures, they turn to curmudgeonly ex-monster hunter and town misanthrope Agnes Stegall for assistance. When she says “no,” the people turn to King Vislor instead. This, as it turns out, isn’t the best of plans. Trouble ensues, more or less.
The novel is my self-indulgent tribute to both humorous, rural town literature (think T.R. Pearson’s A Short History of a Small Place or one of Garrison Keillor’s 9,213,627 books about Lake Woebegon, only not good as either of those things) and Japanese daikaiju (giant monster) movies. Yes, those two things can go together. No, really. Maybe.

I hope all of you will consider snagging a copy when it’s up for sale. It’ll make the best disappointing Christmas present ever. It doesn’t get better than that.

Thanks for all the support and encouragement, folks. I know there aren’t many of you reading this stuff, but that’s just fine. The ones of you who do are totally awesome.

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