Sonnet #3: The Ballad of Slip’ry Sal Umfress
Slip’ry Sal was just a bit of a creep,
Not shy to brush against a woman’s breast
Or to climb up a tree for a quick peep
At a young lady as she would undress.
Often attacked for all his offenses,
Slip’ry Sal has learned to endure a slap.
Women have come to raise their defenses
When ‘ere they see the coming of this chap.
He’s been arrested once or twice you know;
Tossed in jail for always being so lewd.
But frequent imprisonment has not slowed
His lust to see all of the ladies nude.
So off Sal goes again to make “romance,”
Wearing a wagging tongue and rising pants.