You awaken to find yourself washed up on a beach. You don’t remember how you got here, what happened to everyone you know or why running the tip of your tongue along the roof of your mouth produces the faint taste of chocolate and peppercorn. What you do know is this is a strange place and you are a long way from the comfort of what’s familiar.

Off in the distance, you can see a figure beginning to form. The image wavers under the undulating blanket of heat, straining your eyes as they try to focus. But you continue to watch, and as you do the figure gradually begins to take the shape of a man. He appears to be of medium build, around 30 or so, with a patchy goatee and frazzled hair he should have cut a long time ago. He is carrying a mug of coffee and seems to be humming the theme song to some show you can’t quite place. You’re not sure if it’s your memory or his performance that’s slightly off.

As you struggle to stand (he doesn’t motion to help you), he cheerfully says, “Welcome, friend. You are here.”

As you answer, you find your voice is hoarse and weak, as if it hasn’t been used in ages.

What do you say? Choose your words carefully…

A.) Where am I?

B.) Who are you?